Posts Tagged ‘Family’

Are You Waiting for Perfection?

July 14, 2013

Here’s a story that might alter your point of view.

Many years ago, in an episode of Lou Grant, the paper’s editor, upon finding that his elderly mother did not have long to live, went home to spend her last days with her.

As he paced around in her bedroom, he was lamenting the fact that he had always hoped to find the perfect time to take her on a wonderful trip, just the two of them. And now they would not be able to go.

She sweetly motioned for him to come over and sit beside her and told him that he was living his life and that was exactly what she had wanted him to do. She added that he had been the perfect son for her and that she was satisfied with her life.

And then she told him a story that I’ve never forgotten.

She reminded him about his father who had passed years before…

“Do you remember how your father used to pack a picnic lunch and we’d head off to the ocean? Your dad so wanted to find the perfect place with the perfect view for our lunch. And we would drive and drive. There were lots of beautiful places, but he wanted to find the perfect place. Hours  would pass. I’d suggest, “Why don’t we stop here?”

But your dad would respond that he wanted to wait for the perfect spot.  With all the places we could have stopped, none were perfect enough for our picnic. Late in the day we ended up eating our picnic in the car as the sun was getting ready to set, never having stopped, because he never found the perfect place.

And then she focused back on her son, “My life has been wonderful. I couldn’t ask for a better son. I do not need to go on that trip. Just sit with me here and let’s enjoy the time we have right now.”

Don’t miss the beauty of the life you have right here, right now, while you are busy looking for some other situation or some other time when things will be perfect.

Change you perception and find the perfection in the present moment.

______________________________________________________________Dina Dove

As an author, inspirational speaker, and coach, I am dedicated to helping people remember who they really are at their deepest core and discover their unique path to career and personal fulfillment.

For further information, please contact me at Dina@BagladysGuide.com

www.dinadove.com

http://www.facebook.com/BagladysGuide

Who are Your Fab Five?

July 12, 2013

The people you hang around with can tell you a great deal about your life. In fact, they are the main indicators of it.

Good, bad, or ugly, your family will always be your family. Ya gotta love um. But outside your family, you have a lot to say about those you spend time with. So, are you choosing wisely?

Take a minute to run the numbers. Assess how well your ‘Fab Five’ are in alignment with the person you are wanting to be.

1.  List the 5 people, outside of immediate family, that you spend the most time with.

2.  Next to each name, put the number between 1 and 10 (10 being the highest) that best matches the quality of that person’s life.

3.  Determine the average. The resulting number is probably just about where you stand at this time.

Do you want to bring your number up? It’s not that hard. Start making small strides by spending more time in uplifting situations and with uplifting people.  Before too long you’ll see positive changes in your own number.

_____________________________________________________________________Dina Dove

As an author, inspirational speaker, and coach, I am dedicated to helping people remember who they really are at their deepest core and discover their unique path to career and personal fulfillment.

For further information, please contact me at Dina@BagladysGuide.com

www.dinadove.com

http://www.facebook.com/BagladysGuide

Balancing the Laws

July 5, 2013

Truly successful people operate in accordance with the Natural Laws on a consistent basis. You may have heard of the Law of Attraction. It is one of them.

The natural laws by which the world operates are as real as gravity. The problem is, they cannot be seen with the eyes. There are many references both secular and religious.. Here are some well known biblical references.

“Seek and you will find.”

“Pray without ceasing.”

“You reap what you sow.”

They aren’t just “good ideas”, as one might think. They are the premises by which the universe operates.  We do not take them seriously enough.

If you were to take only these three with the same belief you give to the law of gravity, you would have amazing transformation in your career, relationships, and finances.

Balance your implementation of the natural laws. Operate according to them, and your life will magically fall into place.

______________________________________________Dina Dove

As an author, inspirational speaker, and coach, I am dedicated to helping people remember who they really are at their deepest core and discover their unique path to career and personal fulfillment.

For further information, please contact me at Dina@BagladysGuide.com

www.dinadove.com

www.facebook.com/BagladysGuide.com

Skepticism is a Good Thing

April 30, 2013

I love a skeptic. In fact, I am one myself. A wise person does not hitch their wagon to every new thing that comes down the pike. Discernment is important.

There is a difference between discernment and bull headedness though. And that is a very important difference.

We’ve all heard the saying, “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.”

I’ve got some powerful truths to teach you, And…. You will need to make an effort.  Examining your skepticism and getting control over it will be a first step. (Hang it up in the closet for a little while. You can always bring it back out if need be…. But I promise you will not be wanting it back with regards to this.)

The reason? Once your mind is open to experimenting with these new ideas, you will prove to yourself, in your own life, that they work.

Give each new possibility a chance, just a fair chance to change your mind.  This you must do, because if, while being a skeptic you insist on also being bull headed, learning something new, no matter how valuable, will be impossible for you.

You will not be expected to believe anything that you are unable to prove out in your own experience. So do the work, personal work. There is no scientific data to swallow hook, line and sinker.  You alone will be the judge.

Learn some new Laws of the Universe, Natural Laws. They are not really new, just new to you.

At first, no matter what you see change in your life, they still may be hard to believe, you may want to think it’s an accident that your life has suddenly started to work. However, as time goes on and you continue to act and think in the new way, you will see the consistent results over and over again until you can no longer deny that something has changed.

Years ago, I was at a lecture by Wayne Dwyer. The one thing in his speech that stuck with me was that once an individual proves something out in their own life, from that point on, no one will ever be able to tell them that it is impossible. He said, “No one can ever convince me that a person cannot go from rags to riches, because I did it myself. I left the orphanage with nothing and became wealthy.”

There is no proof more powerful than proving it to yourself.

So why isn’t everyone doing it? For the very reason we have been discussing, most people hold on very, very tightly to their original beliefs.

Changing your mind is the most important change you will ever make.

The very hardest part about changing your mind is the first step. That first step is simply a willingness to consider and then examine a new way of being.

_____________________________________________________________Dina Dove

As an author, inspirational speaker, and coach, I am dedicated to helping people remember who they really are at their deepest core and discover their unique path to career and personal fulfillment.

For further information, please contact me at Dina@BagladysGuide.com

www.dinadove.com

www.facebook.com/BagladysGuide.com

Growing Money Trees

April 26, 2013

Have you ever had someone say to you “Money doesn’t grow on trees?”

I know my parents used to say that to me when I wanted the latest new outfit or needed money to go to the city pool.

You know, how we personally feel about money is transferred, through our consciousness, directly to our children. Yikes!

Of course we have budgets to keep in mind and certainly keeping the kids spending habits in check is important. But, how about a new and more positive twist on the old money stories?

Instead of telling them, in essence, that you ‘can’t afford it’, help them to develop their creativity with a different word pattern.

Try statements like these.

“How could we find the money to get that new outfit?”

“What can you do to earn what you need to go to the the movies this weekend?”

Helping put a personal value on what your children want is a win-win for both of you. It inspires creativity, teaches them some personal accountability and shows them how to build their own ‘Money Tree’ from the ground – up.

_______________________________________________________Dina Dove____________

As an author, inspirational speaker, and coach, I am dedicated to helping people remember who they really are at their deepest core and discover their unique path to career and personal fulfillment.

For further information, please contact me at Dina@BagladysGuide.com

www.dinadove.com

www.facebook.com/BagladysGuide.com

The Very Last Time

April 11, 2013

Thinking on the theme of “the last time”, I’m reminded of the lyrics to a song I heard many years ago.

It started out…
“A friend of mine is going blind, but thru the dimness
He sees so much better than me.
“And he cherishes each new thing that he sees.
And he’ll save them for when he’s in darkness again.”

Consider the person who, through the ravages of disease, knows that their days are numbered.
How much different they must see.

My brother passed away after a long struggle with cancer. He was an outdoorsman. His career as a fishing guide spanned 17 years. And, he absolutely loved what he did.

That last winter, when hunting season was over, he proclaimed that that was the last time he would go to deer camp. The cold and the spread of the cancer to his hip had made it a difficult season in a deer blind.

I can imagine that, like the man who was going blind, even in his discomfort, he was also storing every detail in the woods; the crisp winter air, the subtle rustle of the deer, the camaraderie with his friends.
Knowing it was the last time, each moment must have been so precious to him.

In a way, he was lucky, because he heard the message. “This could be the last time.”
And hearing that, loud and clear, I bet he savored the moments more than most.

The truth is…
For all of us…. ‘This could be the last time.’

The last time you drive down a beautiful roadway

The last time you sing the national anthem.

The last time you speak to a loved one

This could be the last time…..
It’s a powerful thought that calls on us to take notice.
And… to cherish the moments of our lives.

The Symbols In Everyday Life

January 31, 2010

Have you ever thought of how much memories play a part in your reactions to things you encounter in daily life?

It’s winter here in Kansas and there are red coats all over the place. To me, a red coat is so much more than a coat. To me, every red coat is a symbol of how much my dad loves me.

You see, my dad supported our family of seven on a butcher’s salary. I was the oldest child and there was no money to pay for higher education. The year before I went away to school, I saved enough to pay for my first year college. I’d also been buying most of my own clothes since I’d gotten my first job when I was 14.

During the early fall, I came home one weekend and went shopping for a coat. I found the most wonderful red wool parka, but it was $25, a huge sum for me at that time. When I got home from the mall, I couldn’t stop talking about it. At some point in the conversation mom said, “Why don’t you go over to your dad’s store and see if he will buy it for you?”

This was so out of the ordinary. We got $2.00 a week for lunch money all thru high school. Other than that, we worked and paid for our own things. But on that day, my dad pulled out his billfold and handed me $25.00.

It was very special and to this day, I see dad in every red coat I pass.

And did you know that no matter how bad you may look on a particular day, a little lipstick will make a big difference?

Mom and I were doing a big construction project and decided to go over to the cafe to grab lunch. We had paint splatters all over us and I thought nothing would improve the way we looked. Regardless of that, mom insisted on putting on her lipstick. I was laughing and telling her it would be a futile gesture.

I didn’t pay attention until we were sitting across the table from each other and then the joke was on me.

Lipstick really does make a difference.

Even when you’re having a really bad day,  put on lipstick, it’s worth the effort. Every time I put on lipstick I think of mom.

By now you are wondering how on earth the word “plethora” ties in with this article. Anytime I see that word I think of Jennifer Brubaker. It’s one of her favorite words. The other day I saw it on a banner for, of all things, Monster Energy Drinks. Forget about the banner, all I could think of was Jennifer, even though we haven’t spoken in over a year. I picked up my cell phone and called her right then and there, all because of a word.

Red coats, lipstick and plethora…. They’re just a few reminders of love, humor, family and friendship.

Look around you.
Be aware.
There are symbols of love everywhere.

A Bad Week for Vanity

December 10, 2009

After attending a high school reunion later in her life, Erma Bombeck commented on the experience.

“I couldn’t possibly have gone to school with all these old people.”

 
And I sure can identify with her sentiment. This week I have seen a backlash of my own personal vanity on several occasions.

The first thing that happened was that I found a recent photo of my ex-husband. We divorced 16 years ago and I have not seen him in that length of time. 

I was just shocked. He looked like he could have been my grandfather. I just had to show someone, so I called up a business associate of mine to see what he thought.

Looking up the photo, I asked him if he thought Rob looked older than me. Pleased, when he answered “yes”, my second question was, “Yes, but by how much?”

Jerry answered, “Oh, at least 4 years.”

“4 years?” I screeched. “4 years? You gotta be kidding. He looks like my grandpa!”

I should have known not to ask Jerry.  He is 20 years younger than me and a great guy. I think of him as a business associate and he thinks of me as a mother figure.

What on earth was I thinking asking him?

Okay. So my family comes for Thanksgiving. I show the photo to my mom and she says he looks very happy and “about right for his age.”  She added that I look nice too.

The next day Janine, my sister-in-law, her teenage daughter and I go to Sandstone Gardens for lunch.  (Janine is only 5 years younger than me.) When we went up to pay, the waitress asked us if we were three generations together for the holiday.  I’m sure the look of surprise/horror on my face made her worry about the tip even before we told her we were sister-in-laws and Malory was my niece.

I have to give the waitress credit for quick thinking, though. Her explanation was that I seemed to be catering to Janine’s wishes by ordering salad so she could have it. “Something a mother would do,” she said.

We laughed and told her it was a good save in a tricky situation.

Needless to say, my vision of myself as eternally young has had a trying week.

As disconcerting as it may be, my whole family, including me, found a great deal of humor in it.

Proving, once again, that there is almost nothing so serious that you can’t get a laugh out of it somewhere.

Fortunes without a Cookie

March 20, 2009

Isn’t that a neat title? Kind of cryptic. It makes you wonder what the blog will be about.

Surprise, surprise! The title is it. Unfortunately I have no subject to match it. I’ve got a bunch of titles for new books, too. No content, just the titles.

Writer’s block, you might ask? Maybe.

Or… maybe I’m just finally ready to let you in on my ‘quirky side’, as my sister calls it. Sonja would be so much better at telling these stories than me. So, I’ll tell a quirky story about my family instead. Because, (secret revealed) our entire family is… shall we say… unique.

We’ve always been atypical.

Imagine this.

In the 1950s our mom and dad had what seemed like, on the outside, a normal relationship; 1 car, 5 kids born in 6 years, dad worked and mom stayed home washing diapers, cooking and cleaning. 

But guess what else.  

While dad was at work, mom remodeled the house. I don’t mean that she hired it done. Mom tore down walls and rebuilt others.

She studied Uri Geller and the Roswell incident. We did experiments with small pyramids and their preserving powers. 

Mom studied the Bible and metaphysics.

Think of it, a family of 7 on a butcher’s salary. There wasn’t extra money for anything. But I don’t ever remember hearing the words, we can’t afford it.

No, we heard that “Your father is on an economy drive.”

 Same message, different energy.

Cool, huh?  

We learned to be resourceful and find ways to make money if we wanted something.

With 5 kids eating everything in sight dad did figure out how to preserve a treat just for him. He bought coconut cookies. He was the only one in the family who would eat them.

Smart dad.

So, let’s see. I actually may be able to tie this back to the title in spite of myself.  I got the cookie. And, you know… 

Without a doubt, my family has been my truest fortune.